In a comment, Sarah asked if I was nervous.
Why would I be nervous? Because in 16 days I am responsible for three events -- every one larger than our entire wedding party? Naw. because I have 350 pounds of linens to launder and fold before that? Nope. Don't be silly. Because my son has decided that THIS is the best time to start acting like a teenager? Pshaw! Because I haven't made the shopping list for the lunch for 250 that I will need to cook in two weeks? Nuh-uh. Because my father-in-law isn't coming for the dinner Friday night because his harridan of a wife doesn't want him to spend $89 on a hotel room and will, instead, drive 3 hours from home the morning of the bar mitzvah, attend, grab a bite at the luncheon and immediately drive home because -- wait for it -- the dog will be in the car? Nope. Not bothering me in the least. That there will be 40 kids in the synagogue running wild until sundown after the bar mitzvah? I won't blink. That my mother-in-law will be here?
Shoot. Me. Now.