- Never, ever, knit lace in a narcotic haze. I don't care if it takes the edges off of your painful childhood memories, effectively blocks out your bad marriage or teen acne, or, as in my case, it helps you forget your mouth full of stitches. Never, ever, knit lace while stoned.
- If you do knit lace while hammered, it is a good idea to use lifelines. Maybe even put them in more frequently that usual. And it wouldn't hurt to stop and count your stitches once in a while.
- Drugs make you sleepy. Sleeping and knitting don't mix. Really. Kinda like the time I tried knitting and swimming. Those floaty things are NOT, I repeat, NOT stable. And whatever you do, do not attempt sleep-knitting with Vicodin on a pool float. Disaster. (Though Knitting with Vicodin may well be the title for the Yarn Harlot's inevitable rehab knitting book.)
- It is very difficult to knit a prayer shawl when you are dropping stitches and cursing. Not that anyone would have recognized it as cursing -- it's is amazing how far a wad of gauze can go towards preserving your reputation for maintaining a high standard of discourse. I let loos a string of expletives so vile that it gave even me pause, and Myfanwe's response was "Of course I'll make you tea, Dearest. You are so sweet." (Recognizing, though, that my true attitude and frame of mind were not conducive to a prayerful and prayer-filled product, I ripped back 11 rows to my lifeline (which I had contemplated -- and rejected -- running again after row 8) and began anew.
- The prayer shawl is absolutely the very, very last lace project I knit with Addi Turbos. I swear, these things are so blunt at the end, I might as well be knitting the shawl on tampons. I am going to purchase a few of the new lace models -- Loopy Yarns is carrying a couple of brands, from what I can tell.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I think it may be time for my meds now.