Wednesday, February 21, 2007

I CAN'T HELP MYSELF...

The whole sordid mess that surrounded the unseemly life and untimely death of Anna Nicole Smith made me sad and embarrassed for her. What a depressing, empty life. I never, in a million years, thought I would ever post about it.

But then I saw this picture of her mother, Virgie Arthur.

I think I can hear the squeak of the polyester pant suit from here. This woman looks like she could hunt bear with a switch. She doesn't make me think she's grieving an unimaginable loss. She looks like she'd bite the head off of anyone who stood between her and a buck-ninety-five. I have no problem believing her daughter wanted nothing to do with her.

Also, doesn't she look like Paul Sorvino in drag? Well, except for the fact that, even with his well-known acting skills, Paul Sorvino has never looked that mean. And he's thinner. And the bags under his eyes are smaller. And he doesn't have that stubble problem above his lips.

Lets face it. Paul Sorvino is far more feminine the Virgie Arthur.


Sorry, Paul. If it's any consolation, I loved you in The Bakers Wife. You totally got rogered out of a Tony.

7 comments:

Angie said...

She does look like Paul Sorvino.

Angie said...

She does look like Paul Sorvino.

Chicago Jen said...

Once again, Aidan, you've made me laugh my head off... Thanks! I completely agree with you about Mother Arthur and the whole ANS fiasco. I've tried like the dickens to avoid listening/ watching anything about her since she passed. BTW, do you think you'll be attending the Harlot's book sigining in Oak Brook on April 3rd?

Aidan said...

Alas, woe is me, I will not be able to attend Ms. McFee's book signing, and I am bereft. It is scheduled, so sadly, on the first/second day of the Festival of Passover, and I will be celebrating and commemorating my redemtion from slavery in Egypt at a seder. Please take lots of pictures and know that, when I dip the parsley in salt water, the tears I taste will be more than symbolic.

I was so looking forward to a group Traveling Sock photo. I'm going to go throw myself on the bed and weep a little now.

mc78 said...

I like the bald Britney gossip better. But my evil heart is starting to melt and I'm empathizing. Eep!

Diane said...

No I think Paul would look much better in drag than Ms Arthur. And he could totally pull off that pants suit, too.

thorn said...

now i'm never going to be able to really listen to anyone again, because i'll be lurking 'til the end of my days... waiting... waiting... for any opportunity to tell someone that they "look like they could hunt bear with a switch." seriously, though; in the specific context of your post, that statement says it all.